[He wasn't going to get emotional about it. It was in the past and he had survived it, no matter what Mutten or Kilmister had done to him. No matter what Jenova had done to him. He would always do what he had to in order to survive day from day. That had gotten him through the last couple of years even on the bad days.
He didn't move when Rude got up to get the bottle and when Rude refilled his glass he drank half of it down. He only glanced at Rude sitting beside him but didn't move away. It was comforting.]
There is nothing to forgive, Rude. I owe you and the others my life. You stayed with me even when I was ill. Yes, it was the sores, they produced a black subst-
[It's when Rude puts his hand over Rufus's that he trails off. He had been holding everything inside for years. Holding in his own emotions since he had to carry the weight of trying to atone for what he and Shinra have done. Even when he was in the wheelchair wrapped in blankets he was still Rufus Shinra who didn't let anyone see him cry or bleed. He had refused to dwell on his own mortality for too long even as the black marks spread across his skin and he wasted slowly away.
Something inside of him shattered suddenly. The barrier he had built to keep all those fears and anxieties away cracked and his hand shook under Rude's. He couldn't just calmly put aside his emotions to deal with another day right now, it was suddenly catching up to him and he didn't know what to do.
His breath caught, slightly shaky, as he turned his palm up to lace his fingers with Rude's. His entire body shook with emotions he had been shoving down and suppressing for two years. He trusted Rude but old habits died hard and he didn't trust himself to speak again.]
no subject
[He wasn't going to get emotional about it. It was in the past and he had survived it, no matter what Mutten or Kilmister had done to him. No matter what Jenova had done to him. He would always do what he had to in order to survive day from day. That had gotten him through the last couple of years even on the bad days.
He didn't move when Rude got up to get the bottle and when Rude refilled his glass he drank half of it down. He only glanced at Rude sitting beside him but didn't move away. It was comforting.]
There is nothing to forgive, Rude. I owe you and the others my life. You stayed with me even when I was ill. Yes, it was the sores, they produced a black subst-
[It's when Rude puts his hand over Rufus's that he trails off. He had been holding everything inside for years. Holding in his own emotions since he had to carry the weight of trying to atone for what he and Shinra have done. Even when he was in the wheelchair wrapped in blankets he was still Rufus Shinra who didn't let anyone see him cry or bleed. He had refused to dwell on his own mortality for too long even as the black marks spread across his skin and he wasted slowly away.
Something inside of him shattered suddenly. The barrier he had built to keep all those fears and anxieties away cracked and his hand shook under Rude's. He couldn't just calmly put aside his emotions to deal with another day right now, it was suddenly catching up to him and he didn't know what to do.
His breath caught, slightly shaky, as he turned his palm up to lace his fingers with Rude's. His entire body shook with emotions he had been shoving down and suppressing for two years. He trusted Rude but old habits died hard and he didn't trust himself to speak again.]